self-admiration.

Everyday of my life that I do not starve, binge, purge, cut, and hate myself is the best day of my life.

And, I am so proud, and so glad, and so thankful every single day.

I had more chances to get better than I probably should have, but the amount of gratitude I possess for those chances is inexpressable and inexplicable. My life is worth so much more than any diet or calorie or number on a scale and I'm so glad to have finally realized that. There are people in this world that die from anorexia and bulimia. I made it out alive. I'm a one in a million chance and I know that. I will always have to be on my guard. One day from now, one week from now, one year from now, even ten years from now. This is not something I can ever be lackadasical with. And, God knows I won't.

I wake up in the morning and it isn't a struggle to look in the mirror, brush my teeth, get dressed, eat breakfast. I am so happy to open my eyes, pull up my shades, and greet each day as if it's my first.

Because, really, everyday is.